Mind Your Language and Rock Your World
How often do you mind your language? I’m not talking about %*$#^ words, but language like always or never. What about should or can’t? How many times a day do you say sorry when it wasn’t your fault?
Minding your language can have a hugely positive influence on your daily life in a remarkable way. You can rock your world by making simple changes in the way you speak.
A fixed mindset bases things on past experiences and shapes future experiences. It can literally stop you in your tracks. Having a flexible mindset means you’re open to possibilities and believe that change is possible.
Every Friday I volunteer to lead a group of ladies on a mountain bike ride through the local hills. With no snooze button we intrepidly don our riding clothes and hop on our bikes to meet at dawn, when we ride into the sunrise.
Sometimes there’s only a few of us and sometimes there’s 15. It’s a mixed group, all with one goal;
To improve our health in body and mind and to have fun.
It’s where I first really noticed language and the negative effect it can have on us. The limiting beliefs that are reinforced when we use language that puts in a fixed mindset. Your mindset can be fixed or flexible.
When you’re mindset is ‘fixed’ you commonly uses words such as always, never, can’t and don’t.
On a Friday morning at dawn, the lady mountain bikers are riding in the rocky hills on a single trail (one bike width) and one stops at an obstacle. She comments ‘I always get stuck here’ or I can never conquer this rocky section’ and then apologises profusely for holding up the person behind her, ‘Sorry, I always hold everyone up’. She carries on riding with the negative voice in her head telling her she’s not a good mountain biker and she’ll never get better. She always holds up the person behind her. I’ll never be able to ride that trail without stopping.
What if she used the ‘mind your language’ technique.
‘I get stuck here, at the moment’
‘I can’t conquer this section, yet’
‘Thanks for waiting while I get going again, I’m working on my skills’
‘I can’t ride that trail without stopping yet, but I’m working on it’
Minding your language gives you a better chance of success. Of conquering things that you thought were never possible. Of quieting the negative thought chatter.
The first step is awareness.
Notice what you say and how you say it. Are you sabotaging yourself?
‘I always fall off my bike’. Guess what? Your brain takes that as a fact and will create your reality. I see this happen so much, especially with women on their mountain bikes.
Sleep is another great example where our language can be more mindful.
‘I can never sleep on an aeroplane’
‘I can’t sleep when it’s noisy or there’s a light on’
Yes you can, but not when your brain is suggesting otherwise. If you keep saying you can’t ever sleep on a plane, chances are you won’t ever sleep on a plane. Switch your mindset to flexible made and try; ‘I can’t sleep on a plane, yet’ and see what happens.
And while you’re at it, drop the ‘should’.
‘Shoulds’ send us into the past or the future and can riddle us with guilt which is a major stress creator. We all want a life with less stress.
Mind your language and swap ‘should’ for ‘could’. If I ‘should’ have I ‘would’ have.
I should go riding in the morning but I always hit the snooze button and I can’t get fit. I should’ve gone riding but I never get up as soon as my alarm goes off.
Next time you find yourself in a fixed mindset shift to the right (or left). Your brain will be less chaotic and amazing things can happen.
Things you ‘never’ thought possible.
Mind your language. It’s a game changer.
How aware of minding your language are you? I’d love to know what you say a lot without realising. Share in the comments and rock other peoples world too.